ada post baru lah hahahah

okay people
it's december
which means holiday is at its dying second
however i'm a bit glad that it's over
well at least i'm not going to be any fatter or i hope so haha
 so people shall we get back to a more serious matter? haha




okay i'm going to talk about
the feeling of despised itself
well everybody must taste this bitterness once if not everyday
but why?
why do we need to have this "despised" feeling?
why can't we be happy all the time?
why can't we just love others unconditionally?



for some people
it is essential as it helps us to become sane
for one person to be happy without any worries
as the saying goes
too many good things is bad
so that's why we need to own that "despised" feeling




as i view it
you despised those who done something wrong or just plain annoying
you despised something that is a nuisance to you
you also despised on the thing you can't accomplish
so those feeling of unaccomplishment (entah wujud ke idok perkataan ni)
turns into well despised of course haha





 So can we like minimised or even better overcome this feeling?
well the answer is yes
but how?
this is when acceptance come in
and i'm not talking about the 1 malaysia thingy okay haha
we need to accept what we have
we need to accept ourselves
we need to accept reality
and most importantly
we need to accept society



as we accept those entity
believe me
you can actually minimised the effects
no bonds gonna be broken
no hatred gonna be spread
no suicide
no homicide
no genocide
if we accept others





look at war if you don't believe me
bosnian genocides was based on revenge
civil war was based on difference of perspective
and even cyber bullying happen because of it




what i'm trying to say here is
we can't change others
but we can change ourselves
be what you are
accept who you are
if you are a javanese with a very strong accent of the javanese language
then be proud of it
if you are a fat boy with dark skins and wavy hair
then screw those who despised you and just flaunt it
we are who we are
change do not happen through forced or hatred
change happen through example
and with that i end this post with this
" irfan kacak gileeee kan?"

the real problem

hello hello
been a while since my last update
it won't be quite fun
but hey just give it a read
you might just like it




Mistakes
the most common doing of all humans
i believe that every human had their fair share of mistakes
and i'm not excluded from it
some might have choose the wrong decision
some might have say the wrong thing
some might have cross the boundary
but hey it's a common thing
so don't be too beat off about it



Well if it such a common things
why do we still get down when a mistakes occured?
why do we feel guilty or scared?
why do we care?
the answer here is
it comes back to your conscience
it comes back to your mind




Mistakes are supposed to be there to be learnt
not to be repeat
mistakes are there for you to know the effects
not mourn about it
mistakes are there to show that you are human
but
that doesn't make mistake an acceptable thing





But why do the same mistake is repeated and repeated again?
aren't we supposed to learn from it?
wasn't it supposed to be a one shot deal?
this is the question that we asked ourselves
yet
those questions are left unanswered
and the same thing kept repeating all over again
like for example
the nerdy kid who always get bullied
the marks you get on your examination
the rejection that you had to face
for that time you'll be singing to the tune of regretness
but they aren't lasting on your actions




The real problem
is not the mistake
is not the decision
but
the real problem here is
your action after those incidents
the action you take to improve
the action you take to show that you had learnt
which always resulted to the same occurence
which is nothing
we let everything slipped because it is in our nature to forget
we let everything slipped because we tend to be neglectful
we cried again and again when the same mistakes happened
we regret again and again when we taste the same dirt
we talk about what could have and should have
yet with all talk and no action
it's like praying without any efforts



so what are the solution?
i'm not going to give you one
i'm no angel who knows everything
i can't tell you this and that
but believe me
with every obstacles
there is always a way through
it is in our head
god doesn't give you the ability to think for nothing
He knows what is your capability
He won't give you something that you're not capable of overcoming it
He knows what best for you
with a bit of do'a and efforts
those mistakes can be avoided
learn
don't sleep
don't regret
change it
you are capable of doing it

semalam, hari ini dan esok

salam sejahtera dunia
bagaimana anda berperasaan pada hari ini?
ya benar sudah lama tiada atas tarikh pada blog ini
mungkin kerana sibuk dengan urusan pembelajaran
tapi akan ku curah sedikit apa yang patut dicurahkan
untuk post pada hari ini



kita sering mendengar kata kata seperti
 Yesterday is history,
 tomorrow is a mystery,
 today is God's gift,
 that's why we call it the present.
Tapi
adakah kita ambil sepenuhnya kata kata ini?
adakah yang lampau itu sudah jadi sebuah pengajaran?
adakah hari ini sudah menjadi sebuah pengalaman?
adakah esok sudah menjadi sebuah impian?
itu adalah untuk kita persoalkan pada diri




jika ditanya kembali pada diri
adakah silam itu menghantui diri
adakah silam itu jahil bagimu

adakah silam itu manis 
jadi tanya kembali pada diri
adakah sudah kita belajar daripada silam ini?
adakah mahu untuk yang silam berulang?
adakah mahu untuk yang silam hilang?
segalanya berbalik kepada tindakan
apakah erti sebuah pengalaman jika tiada iktibar
belajarlah dari silam kerana mereka adalah anda yang lampau




hari ini
ada apa dengan hari ini?
adakah sudah kita isi hari ini dengan segala yang perlu?
adakah sudah kita isi hari ini dengan bermanfaat?
adakah sudah kita isi hari ini dengan pengajaran dari silam?
segala yang kita lakukan pada hari ini
akan menjadi pengajaran bagi esok
dan menjadi pengubah bagi selamanya
hari ini mungkin seperti tiada nilai 
namun adalah tidak ternilai sebenarnya
tiada sebarang harga dapat ditetapkan untuk mengubah
apa yang kita lakukan hari ini
itulah silam kita pada esok



esok
apakah yang mungkin terjadi?
apakah yang mungkin tidak terjadi?
adakah mimipi yang perlu dicapai?
manusia ini sering perkatakan
esok adalah seribu kemungkinan
namun sebelum seribu kemungkinan itu wujud
adakah hari ini kita masih mampu untuk melihat esok?
ya benar esok itu belum pasti
esok itu ketidaktentuan
namun esok itu ditentukan hari ini
tidak wujud sebuah esok yang bermula di syurga jika hari ini masih bergelumang dalam dosa
tidak wujud sebuah esok yang bahagia jika hari ini mesti leka
tidak wujud sebuah esok yang realiti jika harapan kekal menjadi mimpi





sudah di penghujung sebuah post
apa yang ingin diperkatakan adalah
manfaatkan sebuah hari itu
belajarlah daripada yang dahulu
letakkan matlamat pada esok
kita di dunia hanya sementara
jika semalam kita masih leka
hari ini juga kita masih leka
adalah tidak salah jika kita cuba untuk tidak leka di hari yang mendatang
adalah tidak salah jika hari ini menjadi titik perubahan
jadikan mimpi sebuah kenyataan
jadikan kata kata sebuah tindakan
jika segala yang kita buat itu ke arah kebaikan
dengan izinNya kita dipermudahkan
ingatlah siapa yang menentukan segala
doa tanpa usaha adalah umpama mahukan gaji namun tidak mahu kerja
gabungkan kedua duanya
segala akan menjadi sebuah pengalaman yang akan cantik dilihat
itulah pentingnya
semalam, hari ini dan esok
 

Hoping with a sense of hopelessness

This is a post that i admit going to be a bit cheesy
so this a warning
be prepared for something that is super cheesy
and yes if you don't like this post
you may leave now by closing this page thank you
and yes i do intent to make this post
dedicate to my super duper crush
YOU



This is a story about a boy
who always hope for something that he wasn't supposed to hoped for
he hoped to be a lawyer
but it just wasn't to be
he hoped to be a psychologist
but he was let down with the criteria
then he had to choose something that he don't actually have the passion
nor interest
but it was one of his strong points
which is english
to be more precised
it's TESL.
His expectation,
finished this programme as great as he could
and tried to get a scholarship
so that he can show the world he is capable in being at par with the best




As he went through the programme
he managed to make some friends
and he grew closed towards 2 human of the opposite gender
this wasn't a new thing him
as past times have taught him to be not attached to girls
because he knew that it won't end up great
but he was ignorance towards himself
he taught that maybe, just maybe it wasn't going to be like that
then a tragedy strucks




He became really attached towards one of them
and he realised that he had fall for her
he knew this shouldn't happen
it is wrong
he tends to make it go away
but the feelings just came stronger and stronger
he just can't hide it anymore
so he told her about this
although she takes it quite well
but he knew it can't be the same anymore




He always tried to woo her
he always ask her what is his chance
he always tried so hard in making sure that nothing will changed
he do even tried to resolute towards backing off
but she won't let him to not hanging out with her
he do know that in reality
she won't fall for him
he don't want to hoped for anything anymore
he don't want to feel the heartache
to make things worst
she already have her own choice
a smart boy with an aspiring to be a doctor
who had received the scholarship to pursue his study in Russia
even if that boy keep on wasting his chance
the girl will still always keep on waiting on him.
The boy just kept on smiling
hoping with a sense of hopelessness
that maybe just maybe
in a crazy universe
she would give him the chance that he long for




The story above is a true occurence
and yes it's still happening
let just hope that everything would be alright for him
that maybe just once he could have the thing that he hoped for
it's not like he isn't trying or anything
and for YOU
know this
i would only trade this friendship for ours for only one thing
and I think you do know what it is right?

A friend in need is a friend indeed

It's been quite a while since i last posted here
i do know my blogging skills is a bit rusty
but nevertheless i'll try ny best to entertain
and give you something to think about



Friends
who doesn't need them?
let it be the alpha male or the non alpha female
friends is a must have item for everyone
how do you define a friend?
is a friend is purely someone who is great to be hang out with?
is a friend purely on someone who like giving us advice?
or maybe someone who thinks alike?
If you ask me
I would say that
friend is someone who knows how to react
who understands without knowing much
who can tag along without being asked
that is a friend


From the beginning of my life in Uitm
I wouldn't believe that I'm gonna find anyone as great as my old friend
someone like hazman
someone like miry
they are irreplaceable
yet things does intrigued me
for instance, amjad
he's quite a character
someone who is very funny yet very understanding
luke, the bald gangster from sarawak
someone whom everyone considers as a weirdo
but try talk to him for a change
you'll realised he isn't that bad
and of course an honourary mention
to Hannan
the Besut kid who always stole my clothes haha
yes there are those like azree and labu
but sorry you didn't quite make my list YET haha
Yet
none of them I consider as my best friend
yes they are my friends
just not the best
except for amjad of course




The best of friend I found here in Uitm
comes in the form of someone who laugh so hard
that when people hear it
their eyebrow rises and go like  "haa?"
Her name is
yes it's a She haha
Nur Afatin Rahmat Binti Sarif
At first sight, she do looks quite gedik and spoilt
but after lepaking with her
i realised she is totally different from that
she's quite funny
she knows how to take a joke
she can be the serious one
but
she can also be a bit nutty at times
her punch and slaps do got its own stings haha
but the greatest thing about her is
she understands me so well
there are things i know that when i told her it'll be safe
that it won't change anything
she knows how to carve a smile when i'm a bit down
and yes
she do takes care of me like for example
tutup mulut tu!
buat kerja lah!
siapa suruh makan!
and more haha
one more thing
she's quite slow haha




Afa and Lisa
both of you truly gives me reason to go to Intec
reason for me to keep on smiling
reason for me to keep on studying
Thank You Allah
for blessing me with such great friend like amjad and afa
i truly am grateful for them
I really really hope that nothing will change our friendship
because without you ladies and gentlemen
I am nothing
I really love you guys
I truly am

kekurangan kau kemahuan aku

kekurangan

siapa tak punya kekurangan?

ada punya tulisan buruk

ada punya mata kecil sebelah

ada punya bibir sumbing

namun

siapa kita nak persoal mereka

mereka tidak pinta begitu

mereka tidak kisah jadi begitu

tapi kita terlalu menghukum

kita agung yang cantik

kita lanyak yang hodoh

hingga mereka rasa tersisih

hingga mereka rasa hina

kau mahu dia sempurna di mata kau

kau mahu hidungnya mancung

kau mahu bibirnya tebal

kau mahu matanya bulat

tapi apa kau tahu apa dia rasa

dia taksub dengan kau

dia lakukan segala untuk kau

dia mahu jadi terbaik di mata kau

dia lupa erti dosa bila dengan kau

bila kau rasa kemanisan dia

kau buang dia di jalanan hina

kekurangan kita perlu terima

indah atau tidak bukan kita untuk tentu

jangan ubah diri kerana seseorang

jangan kau pinta mahu bedah

kau ingatlah segalanya berhikmah

ketetapan ilahi tidak pernah salah

namun

masyarakat perfectionist yang bersalah

mahukan kesempurnaan dalam segala

sedangkan kau dan aku lebih tahu

bukan kesempurnaan yang perlu dikejar

tapi kecemerlangan

terima diri kita seadanya

jangan pernah rasa tak berguna

tuntasnya

kecantikan,kehodohan,kekacakan itu semua pendapat orang

kau boleh ubah jika kau percaya

kau pekakkan mereka yang menghina

kau butakan mereka yang mengejek

kau tenangkan hati kau dan percayalah

kau aku dan mereka semua juga manusia

pasti wujud juga kekurangan

sentiasa kau ingat

kita manusia ciptaan terbaikNYA

wujudnya kekurangan agar kita rasa rendah

agar kita sedar kekuasaan yang esa

terima diri kita seadanya

aku percaya aku dan kau mampu laluinya

apa sudah jadi dengan kita?

pada suatu pagi yang mendung

aku bangkit dari lenaku

lalu aku menyelak langsir untuk melihat panoramaku

namun apa yang aku lihat hanyalah kacau bilau

apa yang aku dengar hanyalah jeritan dan tangisan

apa yang aku hidu hanyalah darah dan gas2 beracun.

di saat ini aku mulai sedar

segala yang berlaku semua salah kita

bila persefahaman sudah hilang erti

bila pergaduhan menjadi solusi

bila air mata menjadi sebati

aku sedar kita cuba menegakkan fahaman kita

namun tanpa kisah akan fahaman lain

aku faham kita punya pandangan berbeza

namun tidak semestinya kita sahaja yang benar

kau salahkan insan2 lain

sedangkan diri kau punca segalanya

adakah kita tidak mahu keamanan lagi?

adakah kita mahu kacau bilau terus berlarutan?

adakah kita mahu darah bertitisan tanpa makna?

aku tidak kesiankan kau dan mereka

aku kesiankan golongan muda

mereka punya hak untuk berasa selamat

mereka punya hak pendidikan

namun kita rampas kerana taksub dengan ideologi kita

kita taksub dengan kekuasaan dunia

sedangkan kekuasaaan ilahi lebih hebat

aku bukan perkatakan ada pihak yang benar

aku perkatakan kita semua bersalah

kita sendiri musnahkan segalanya

lambang kemegahan bangsa beriya dibanggakan

namun tiada apa dapat ditunjukkan

usahlah kita terus begini

aku terlalu letih untuk terus begini

aku rindu duniaku yang dulu

aku rindu di saat kita masih boleh berlari bebas

disaat masih wujud nilai toleransi

namun aku sedar

alaf ini tiada jalannya

aku harus terima apa yang berlaku

kerana inilah hakikat dunia

di atas merupakan bayangan penulis berkenaan dgn bagaimana rupa dunia pada 2050

ini bukan karutan lalai semata mata

namun cuba anda fahamkan cerita itu

sedar atau tidak

ada yang telah berlaku

ada yang sudah ada tanda2

mungkin cerita aku sedikit bombastic

namun apa yang aku bayangkan

hanyalah melalui pemerhatianku terhadap dunia kini

ini bukan post politics or anything

just that i want you guys to realised we are going towards this direction

wake up from your slumber

berapa lama lagi kita mahu terus sangkut dalam lamunan

sedarlah wahai anak anak muda

peperangan tidak pernah jadi penyelesaian

aku cintakan generasi akan datangku

aku mahu mereka rasakan apa yang aku rasa mungkin lebih baik

konklusi di sini

ianya semudah

bersatu kita teguh bercerai kita roboh